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Confession: I’ve never loved the term “self-care” when it comes to motherhood.
As I type the term into this blog post, I actually cringe a little bit.
Confused? Let me explain.
(Or feel free to skip to the bottom of the post to learn my Ayurvedic Self-care techniques if you aren’t interested in my self-care rant..)
While I understand how essential it is to care for yourself, the reality for many moms is that it often feels impossible—and for some, it truly is.
The unrelenting demands of motherhood can leave little time, energy, or resources for anything beyond meeting the needs of everyone else..
As a mom, I know how easy it is to pour every ounce of energy into caring for others, always putting yourself last on the list.
For years, I struggled with this—like so many moms do—focusing all my time and attention on my family while neglecting my own needs.
I have been working, little by little, to prioritize my own well-being again. It’s a slow and often challenging process.
And while I’ve certainly come to realize that self-care is absolutely necessary for moms, I also know that self-care alone isn’t enough.
Self-care for mothers becomes much more accessible when it’s paired with something just as vital: Community Care.
What is Community Care?
Community Care is about weaving support into the very fabric of our society, creating a culture where everyone has access to the help they need to thrive.
It goes beyond individual self-care, recognizing that true nourishment often comes from connection and mutual support.
Community care means ensuring that resources, kindness, and care are shared, so no one is left to carry their burdens alone.
It’s about fostering a sense of belonging, where people feel seen, valued, and supported by their neighbors, friends, and society as a whole.
When we embrace community care, we create an environment where everyone can flourish—together..
Having support—whether from grandparents, friends, neighbors, or a partner—can make all the difference in finding those rare and precious moments for yourself.
But I also know that not everyone has this support, and that’s a deeper societal issue that urgently needs to be addressed by businesses, communities, and governments.
Far too many mothers are out there struggling to meet their family’s most basic needs on their own, leaving nothing at the end of the day with which to nurture themselves.
I know this because I’ve been there.
Before I met my loving partner, I was a single mother raising my eldest daughter with little to no daily help.
Each day was a marathon of meeting our essential needs, and by the time the evening came, I was completely spent.
There was nothing left in me to “fill my own cup” with.
That experience taught me two vital lessons: first, how crucial support is, and second, how unsustainable it is to try to do everything on your own.
If you’re a mom with little to no support reading this, I want you to know: I see you.
I’m not here to tell you to somehow carve out time for yourself when it feels utterly impossible.
If that’s where you are, my best advice is this: take slow, deep breaths whenever you can and remember this is just a season in your life.
You are human, and it’s natural and expected to feel overwhelmed, exhausted, sad, resentful, lonely, or even desperate at times.
None of these feelings mean there’s anything wrong or shameful about you. They don’t make you a bad mom.
You’re carrying the weight of your world on your shoulders, and that can feel unbearable.
I hope and pray that help finds its way to you, and that we see a cultural shift towards Community Care.
Until then, I hope you can treat yourself with kindness, love, and compassion. You deserve that, at the very least.
And for those mothers reading who do have even a little help—whether it’s a partner, a friend, or a kind neighbor—I encourage you to lean into that support however you can. You also deserve it.
With even a very small supportive community (mine includes just my husband on the daily), it becomes possible to carve out a little bit of time to nourish yourself in ways that truly help sustain you.
That is why, for this New Year, I’m leaning into the support I have, and once again embracing the wisdom of Ayurveda to weave a few simple, nourishing self-care rituals back into my life.
A little history:
Before my children were born, I practiced Ayurveda daily, and it was an incredibly nourishing and transformative part of my life.
I truly believe practicing Ayurveda prior to giving birth gave me the resilience I needed to navigate those deeply challenging early years of motherhood.
When my first child arrived, however, maintaining my Ayurvedic self-care routine became much, much harder. Impossible even. For years, I let many of my practices fall away.
It was difficult to find the time—and even more challenging to summon the energy—to care for myself amidst the demands of single-motherhood.
In those early years, I also developed a habit of hyper-independence. At the time, it was a necessary coping mechanism—a way to keep everything afloat.
But over the years, it became an unhealthy pattern, making it incredibly difficult for me to ask for help, even from those closest to me.
Eventually, trying to do everything without tending to my own needs led to debilitating mom burnout.
That was my wake-up call: something had to change.
I realized that change had to start with me—learning to lean into and accept the support I had and prioritizing my well-being again.
Even with this realization, breaking the cycle of hyper-independence hasn’t been easy. I’ve found myself falling back into old habits, burning out, and starting over more times than I can count.
It’s a journey of imperfections—an ever-unfolding process of learning and growing.
After nearly burning out yet again, I’ve decided to approach this New Year with more intention.
And so, I’ve re-committed to embracing the wisdom of Ayurveda with three simple self-care practices that are easy to weave into even the busiest of days.
These small acts of care feel like a gentle way to reconnect with myself and find balance once more.
For those unfamiliar, Ayurveda is an ancient system of holistic healing that originated in India over 5,000 years ago.
Rooted in the belief that true wellness comes from balancing the mind, body, and spirit, Ayurveda emphasizes natural practices, nourishing routines, and alignment with the rhythms of nature.
By understanding our unique constitution, or dosha, and incorporating daily rituals, Ayurveda offers a gentle and personalized approach to cultivating long-term health and vitality.
These practices that I’m about to share with you don’t take much time, but they create space to reconnect with myself and feel truly cared for.
And they are actually do-able for a busy mom with very little extra time, and are not cost prohibitive for those of us on a budget.
So here are the three simple Ayurvedic rituals I’ve started practicing again for this New Year, and I hope they inspire you to create moments of nourishment for yourself too!
1. Warm Lemon Water to Greet the Morning
Each morning, before the day begins its whirl of activity, I take a quiet moment for myself with a glass of warm lemon water.
After cleansing my tongue with my tongue scraper and brushing my teeth, I squeeze fresh lemon into a large glass of warm filtered water and drink it down quickly, which allows my body to begin flushing toxins that have accumulated during sleep.
It feels like a gentle hug for my digestion, helping to cleanse and hydrate my body before I even think about breakfast. This small ritual is a grounding way to start my day, and I’ve noticed how much more centered I feel when I take this time for myself.
2. Weekly Skin Brushing for a Fresh Glow
Skin brushing has become one of my favorite weekly rituals.
With soft raw silk gloves (these are best, but you can also use a natural bristle body brush or a simply a cotton washcloth) gently exfoliate your skin, starting with long strokes on arms and legs, then smaller circles on the back and torso, giving special attention to your abdomen, and always moving towards the heart.
I do this right before showering, followed by an Aurvedic self-massage (outlined below). It’s a simple act, but it makes such a difference. It leaves my skin feeling soft and radiant, boosts circulation, and moves lymphatic fluid which helps me feel more energized. I love the sense of renewal it brings—it’s like a reset for my body as well as my spirit.
3. Ayurvedic Self-Massage for Deep Nourishment
This is the ritual I look forward to most: self-massage with warm organic sesame oil or a beautiful herbal blend. The practice, called Abhyanga in Ayurveda, feels like wrapping myself in a cocoon of care.
Warm the oil slightly in your hands and take your time, massaging it into your skin with love and intention.
To save time, I perform this ritual as I take a hot shower. Doing so not only allows me to cleanse and refresh my body, but also helps the oil to penetrate the deeper layers of my skin while at the same time preventing me from feeling too oily afterwards.
It’s a deeply relaxing ritual, and helps calm my mind, soften my skin, and restore balance. Even on busy days, this practice feels like a gift to myself, and I always come away feeling more grounded and whole.
Note: these rituals can all be done daily if you have the time! I don’t, so I do them weekly (except the lemon water which is easy for me to do every day)… so focus on doing what works for you and your schedule, and enjoy!
These rituals remind me that self-care doesn’t have to be complicated to be effective. It’s about carving out small, meaningful moments to nourish ourselves—body, mind, and spirit.
As we step into a new year, I hope these Ayurvedic practices inspire you to embrace your own self-care journey with love and intention.
You truly deserve it Mama.
If you would like a few more simple self-care ideas click here.
If you would like to learn more about the health benefits of Ayurveda click here.
